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When the Tears Begin …

There are moments of joy, sadness, anger, and everything in between when someone is on journey to self-improvement, new success, or anything new and different and sometimes in the year of #uncertainty, the tears begin. I can’t think of anyone who has not witnessed the tears of another in his/her personal or professional life.  The tears I am speaking of are not the excited and happy tears, rather the tears of anger, sadness, frustration, and anxiety.

For those of us on the receiving end of tears, we are receiving an amazing gift, someone being real vulnerable, and authentic. We are receiving an opportunity with an individual. At the moment of tears, this individual is showing his/her hopes and fears, real feelings not sugar coated or analyzed. This is a pivotal moment with someone.

How you react can make or break a relationship both personally and professionally. Some people struggle with the tears of another and may dismiss or downplay them. This is a lost opportunity for a breakthrough. Ultimately, the tears are the lightbulb going off moment. It is where the fantasy and reality meet. The tears are a moment when a person needs to decide what’s next.

Those of us receiving can ultimately guide, direct, and console. We can listen fully for fears and other emotions coming through. Sometimes we hear true motivations and what is really guiding an individual to make current choices. This is the moment we have insight to help someone. This is the time for change.

 A person in tears has some choices to make. How to handle something? What is next? Do I do the same thing or something different? Should I? Could I? After the tissues, the action a person takes can make or break an individual. This is the moment someone may look back on the choices of the past and choose something different. This is the moment a person may look at the support network and deicide if it is adequate. This is the moment of growth.

In our workforce professional land we would like people to fit into the construct we have created, people who are happy and grateful at receiving the help and people who not only participate in a calm and pleasant manner with progress towards goal achievement.. Unfortunately this is not the case. The truth is we are going to see tears regardless of your position. Tears fall for receptionists and case managers alike. Tears fall in front of the business community and hiring employers even when we don’t want them to. These are all moments of growth. Even in someone’s moment where they are not at their best, growth is happening.


With the world going back to many of the ways considered normal before the pandemic, it is likely the opportunity to experience tears again will be real. People will not be hiding behind a Zoom veil with filters. People will be back to being in-front of you. My hope is all the tears you see are tears of joy and happiness at success. Yet when they are not, I hope you can use those moments to help someone find their motivation.

~Karen Cirincione

Email: kcirincione@gmail.com        

Linked In: www.linkedin.com/in/karenjcirincione

Twitter: @kcirincione 

 

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