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Single and Jobless


I was watching a news program early in January and I learned that one of the top New Year’s resolutions for single people is to find a partner.  After this story, the news program went on to discuss how to best use online dating sites. I chuckle at this, not just because I am married and have never used an online dating site, but because I have been comparing dating and the process of finding a mate to finding a job for years.

I find that the same process used to find a mate can be used to find a job. Know anyone who is single and jobless? Maybe it is because they are lacking some key things necessary. So I am not a professional match maker, but I firmly believe that if someone is single, he can apply the tips about job seeking to the dating scene.  My goal here is to present the similarities between dating and job seeking.

 
Linked In for Boyfriends

Sites like eHarmony and Match.com are setting up social profiles of skills, aptitudes, and interests much like a job seeker’s Linked In profile. The difference is that one is to find a man or woman to be partners in life/love with and the other is to find a partnership in business. People look at each other’s profiles and decide if that is someone that I would like to take the relationship further with (i.e. meet in person). Tips for getting hits on dating sites have to do with getting a good photograph, honestly representing your interests and background, and making sure you have a complete profile. Sound like any articles you have seen about Linked In? If you agree, this is my first point.
 
Speed Dating or Job Fair

I have never been speed dating before, but in speed dating, a person has a few short minutes talking to prospective partners. At the end, a person can decide if he/she wants to ask a person for a future date. At a job fair, candidates for hire approach recruiters and have a few minutes to make an impression and employers may decide to contact a person for more in-depth information. Both a fast, whirl wind kinds of experiences.  Both require a person to make a good impression without being too pushy. They both require a delicate balance of social interaction and sales of thyself.

 Networking Event or Singles Mixer

 When you go to a networking event, you meet many people, but only speak with each one briefly. In this short amount of time, you goal is to sell yourself to other people. Singles mixers work very much the same way. There is a reality show on the Bravo network called the Millionaire Matchmaker. In this show, the matchmaker holds mixer events where a single man has the opportunity to meet many single women. Then at the end of these events, the single man can pick two women to have a short conversation with. The end result is that that the man picks one of these two women to have a regular date with. The show searches for dates for women and for people seeking same-sex relationships too. When I watch this, I see a job seekers trying to navigate the world of job seeking to land that interview.

If you like it, then you should have put a job offer on it…

Have an interview lately? The interviewing process might be long and drawn out or fast. It is different for each person, position, and company. The interview may be standard one-on-one, may include a panel, may include telephone/virtual conversations, or may be with multiple people in an organization.  At each interaction, the job seeker is trying to land an employment offer.  Now to dating. When two people meet, sometimes they decide to make a commitment quickly. Other times, a dating situation can go on for years without a formal commitment. If a person is getting serious about a potential life partner, he may meet the family, his friends. The person may participate in life events. All means to audition the person for the job of life partner.  Is this the right match for me in life? Job Seekers and employers ask themselves the same questions.  In both dating and job seeking, if the relationship is not headed to a commitment within a reasonable amount of time, a person will move on.

  
As you can see there are similarities. I see that in both job seeking and dating, a person needs to sell himself to another. A person may use many tools to show what he has to offer.  The tools can be used in person or virtual.  Like job seeking, a person hiding behind a computer and not coming out will not find a job or a life partner.  The best approach to finding a job and a mate is a combined approach of good old fashioned people skills and using the technology of the 21st century. 
 
If you are single or job seeking, good luck. The process to find a job or a partner can be a long and involved one. If you help job seekers (or single people), you may want to take a moment to help the people you work with develop their social skills and technical skills. 

Questions, comments, angry rants? If anyone has any comments or further tips for the single and the jobless, feel free to post below or send me an email at kcirincione@gmail.com ~Karen Cirincione

Comments

  1. Fearless and Couageous Karma Slicing Alpha Female January 31, 2015 at 1:51 AM

    Well said and I couldn't agree with you more, please check out a speech I did on job seeking and dating. I don't think I put it as well as you did, but we are definitely on the same page! http://youtu.be/CbK3lO_s4Gc

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    Replies
    1. KCSpeaksJanuary 31, 2015 at 8:58 PM

      It would be interesting to take a romantic comedy movie about dating and turn it into a movie about job seeking to prove a point. Once I told a job seeker I was working with that job seeking was like dating and he said "great, another thing I am not good at." Thank you for reading!

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